Dangit...I jinxed the Packers. After gloating about Rodgers' no-interception prowess yesterday, today he threw three interceptions and may have dislocated his shoulder. I can practically hear God laughing at me.
However, we interrupt this episode of me feeling stupid to bring you this breaking report:
THEBREWERSAREINTHEPLAYOFFSOMGWTHCANYOUBELIEVEIT
ITSBEENTWENTYSIXYEARSANDWELIKETOTALLYBEATTHECUBSTOO
ITWASSOAWESOMEIMSOPUMPED!!!!!!!
N.L. Wild Card, baby! Woo to the hoo!
Next up, on to Philadelphia. It's payback time!
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Sports
(I realized the other day that I should probably post again so that my readers don't think I'm in some kind of permanent funk. Things are, in fact, going just fine for me now, although I still really miss all my Knox pals. But I'll see them in about a month and again in January, which is nice.)
Up until I became a bartender, I wasn't much of a sports fanatic. I mean, I knew the rules of football, baseball, basketball, and the like, and I'd watch games if they were on, but I just didn't care deeply enough to seriously follow a sport. Now that I get tips for knowing the records of various teams and obscure football rules, though, I follow EVERYTHING. If you want to know how to play water polo, how the Olympic trampoline event is judged, the difference between men's and women's artistic gymnastics (or the difference between artistic and rhythmic gymnastics, or the difference between regular volleyball rules and beach volleyball rules), what "grounding" means in football, how ties for the wild card slot in baseball are decided, or just what yesterday's Packers/Brewers/Jets/Badgers/Mets score was or who the aforementioned teams play next, I'm your girl.
But just as tips were the motivating factor behind my newfound sports fanaticism, that same self-interest requires me to keep some of those newfound fanatic beliefs to myself--first and foremost, my views on Brett Favre. We get a lot of people in the bar who are Jets fans "because we're loyal to Brett, not some hotshot kid who hasn't done anything for the team." That's great, kiddos, but I'm loyal to the Packers, and I want you to stop hating on my effing quarterback, because in case you haven't noticed, Brett isn't doing anything for the Packers anymore, and Rodgers has been performing beyond anyone's expectations.
Yes, I have a soft spot for Brett. But these PUMAs (Packer Unity My Ass) really tick me off. So it is to them that I dedicate this song parody, which I wrote while watching the Jets/Chargers game on Monday:
Interceptions (to the tune of "Interjections" from Schoolhouse Rock)
The Jets were down by seven to ten (uh-huh)
When Brett went out and did it again--
He had no conception
'Til he saw the reception
That the Chargers would score on an interception!
Chorus:
Interceptions!
They're a nightmare
For the offense!
They're generally not the kind of thing you want your QB throwing much,
Or in which to have him lead the league.
You say "the kid" will never excel (uh-huh)
But so far Aaron's doing quite well.
And since his inception,
Without an exception,
He hasn't thrown even one interception!
CHORUS
So though Brett's absence
Feels strange,
It makes a
Nice change
That when we pass now
Downrange
We don't throw touchdowns for the other team!
So please, go take a moment to pause
Before claiming that Brett Favre had no flaws.
Your pure self-deception
Won't change my perception
That Brett was the king of the interception!
CHORUS
Interceptions!
They're a nightmare!
We don't throw them.
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah YEAH!
Not the best song parody I've ever written, but it was fun. If I get bored this week, I think I'll try writing one about politics (I'm currently torn...should one stick to the Schoolhouse Rock theme and parody McCain to "Just a Bill," or does he deserve the full-out "American Pie" treatment? Decisions, decisions...)
Up until I became a bartender, I wasn't much of a sports fanatic. I mean, I knew the rules of football, baseball, basketball, and the like, and I'd watch games if they were on, but I just didn't care deeply enough to seriously follow a sport. Now that I get tips for knowing the records of various teams and obscure football rules, though, I follow EVERYTHING. If you want to know how to play water polo, how the Olympic trampoline event is judged, the difference between men's and women's artistic gymnastics (or the difference between artistic and rhythmic gymnastics, or the difference between regular volleyball rules and beach volleyball rules), what "grounding" means in football, how ties for the wild card slot in baseball are decided, or just what yesterday's Packers/Brewers/Jets/Badgers/Mets score was or who the aforementioned teams play next, I'm your girl.
But just as tips were the motivating factor behind my newfound sports fanaticism, that same self-interest requires me to keep some of those newfound fanatic beliefs to myself--first and foremost, my views on Brett Favre. We get a lot of people in the bar who are Jets fans "because we're loyal to Brett, not some hotshot kid who hasn't done anything for the team." That's great, kiddos, but I'm loyal to the Packers, and I want you to stop hating on my effing quarterback, because in case you haven't noticed, Brett isn't doing anything for the Packers anymore, and Rodgers has been performing beyond anyone's expectations.
Yes, I have a soft spot for Brett. But these PUMAs (Packer Unity My Ass) really tick me off. So it is to them that I dedicate this song parody, which I wrote while watching the Jets/Chargers game on Monday:
Interceptions (to the tune of "Interjections" from Schoolhouse Rock)
The Jets were down by seven to ten (uh-huh)
When Brett went out and did it again--
He had no conception
'Til he saw the reception
That the Chargers would score on an interception!
Chorus:
Interceptions!
They're a nightmare
For the offense!
They're generally not the kind of thing you want your QB throwing much,
Or in which to have him lead the league.
You say "the kid" will never excel (uh-huh)
But so far Aaron's doing quite well.
And since his inception,
Without an exception,
He hasn't thrown even one interception!
CHORUS
So though Brett's absence
Feels strange,
It makes a
Nice change
That when we pass now
Downrange
We don't throw touchdowns for the other team!
So please, go take a moment to pause
Before claiming that Brett Favre had no flaws.
Your pure self-deception
Won't change my perception
That Brett was the king of the interception!
CHORUS
Interceptions!
They're a nightmare!
We don't throw them.
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah YEAH!
Not the best song parody I've ever written, but it was fun. If I get bored this week, I think I'll try writing one about politics (I'm currently torn...should one stick to the Schoolhouse Rock theme and parody McCain to "Just a Bill," or does he deserve the full-out "American Pie" treatment? Decisions, decisions...)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
